Jumping the Gun

I feel as though perhaps I jumped the gun in asking for advice on how to break away from the church. I'm not entirely sure I'm ready for that. I'm still not even sure if that's what I really want to do. I don't think that the LDS church has brought any harm to my life and has at times brought much needed peace to me, but my problem with it still goes back to the early church history and past teachings and practices. My issues are probably the standard issues any person researching the Mormon church comes across- polygamy, temple rituals and the Masons, blacks and the priesthood, male dominance, Joseph Smith and the translation of the Book of Mormon, lack of DNA evidence of Book of Mormon descendants. Some of these things just don't add up and I have not found through any of my research a satisfying answer in favor of the Mormon faith. Yet, somehow I still feel guilt over my "lack of faith." I am terrified of leaving a religion and culture that has been a huge part of my upbringing and is still a huge part of my family. It's not so simple to just leave. I'm sacred of the ostracism I will face from my family and friends should I choose to take a different path. I feel so confused and ashamed and guilty and hurt and sad and angry and ugly all at the same time. Sometimes I wish I could go back to being ignorant- it's less painful.